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fishman
15 Feb 2010, 05:40 PM
for those of you old enough to remember whose line is it anyway, tis the 'worlds worst' game, or more modern times from mock the week, 'things you would never hear on xxxx'

so... this is how it works, the winner posts a subject, category or such like and you post a comedy answer....

previous winner judges the best efforts after 24 to 48 hours ish,

1st place gets 5 points,
2nd place gets 2
3rd place gets 1

ok, i'll start:


Things you would never hear a sports commentator say:

(example answer; and again Scotland finish top of their world cup qualifying group)

(will allow multiple answers if you realllly can't contain yourself... but 2 or 3 max! preferably only 1, but as i said, if you realllly cant contain yourself) :P

Approving this thread comes with a conditional: No being racist/homophobic etc, most of you know where to draw the line, so be warned, also no mentioning Laika at all.
Regards

chatter
15 Feb 2010, 05:45 PM
I need a bloody pint after this rubbish game of footy.

Sal92
15 Feb 2010, 05:52 PM
:depress::depress:

And John Terry proudly wearing that Armband. And leading his country to the World Cup.

Sal92
15 Feb 2010, 05:55 PM
Broken Noses, thick muscular necks, mishapen ears and crushing thighs.

Wow,

the rugby players wives are minging.

X3Dragon
15 Feb 2010, 05:58 PM
OH AND HE'S MAKING A LEFT TURN

HE'S MAKING ANOTHER LEFT TURN

OMG AND ANOTHER LEFT TURN!!!

i wonder what he's gonna do next!!!

(i know its been said before by puppets but its classic):D

Hamster fuzz
15 Feb 2010, 06:03 PM
I don't believe my eyes, England have won the world cup.

U.N. Owen
15 Feb 2010, 06:03 PM
Another wonderful display of skill and determination from an excellent portsmouth side :D

St0rM 59
15 Feb 2010, 06:03 PM
Tiger Woods Is Gonna Come Home to a Happy Wife Tonight!

Sal92
15 Feb 2010, 06:05 PM
and its the coin toss,

and johnny wilkinson has sprained his thumb!

john the saint
15 Feb 2010, 06:05 PM
Another lucky display of terrible football from an awful portsmouth side :D

I totally agree with you mate :D

Sal92
15 Feb 2010, 06:06 PM
OH JESUS CHRIST, OH MAN, WHAT THE HELL?

OH MY LORD, JESUS *BEEP*ING CHRIST, WHAT IN THE BLAZING HELLS IS JOHN TERRY DOING?!?!

missing that penalty, jeeez

And you can't help thinkng.... if only john terry did have that GAG on....

X3Dragon
15 Feb 2010, 06:10 PM
And you can't help thinkng.... if only john terry did have that GAG on....

I screwed that message up a treat :D

i tried switching it for england have won the world cup but by the time i finished somebody beat me too it! :mad:

X3Dragon
15 Feb 2010, 06:12 PM
HI im Barry Scott! and im here to tell you about the Olympics!

Hamster fuzz
15 Feb 2010, 06:17 PM
And that was fantastic lunge by John terry. It caught Chery Cole completely bu surpirse.

Lynx Lynx
15 Feb 2010, 06:20 PM
Tasmania have just won a match!

Andy Murray beat Federer! :p

deepbluesea
15 Feb 2010, 06:22 PM
And that was fantastic lunge by John terry. It caught Chery Cole completely bu surpirse.


To be honest- I think that might just be quite likely....

jamie the slaye
15 Feb 2010, 07:10 PM
OH AND HE'S MAKING A LEFT TURN

HE'S MAKING ANOTHER LEFT TURN

OMG AND ANOTHER LEFT TURN!!!

i wonder what he's gonna do next!!!

(i know its been said before by puppets but its classic):D

OMG OMG OMG HE MADE A RIGHT TURN!

Peanut ftw!

Psychoville
15 Feb 2010, 08:30 PM
They think it's all over. IT IS NOW . The togo team have been killed by gunmen !

astrox
15 Feb 2010, 09:31 PM
Things you wouldn't hear a television presenter say:

You're watching ITV1... Why are you doing that? I've got the listings here and... we've got nothing!

2xw
15 Feb 2010, 10:51 PM
And the balls there, going to and fro, backwards and forwards,


The nudst competition here is really hotting up!

fishman
15 Feb 2010, 11:17 PM
Cool, well a nice response, may as well judge right away!!! :D :D :D

1st

Broken Noses, thick muscular necks, mishapen ears and crushing thighs.

Wow,

the rugby players wives are minging.

2nd

Things you wouldn't hear a television presenter say:

You're watching ITV1... Why are you doing that? I've got the listings here and... we've got nothing!

3rd

Tiger Woods Is Gonna Come Home to a Happy Wife Tonight!

~~~~~~~~~~~
LEADER BOARD
Sal92 - 5 points
astrox - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 point
~~~~~~~~~~~


Sal92 to post next

Sal92
16 Feb 2010, 08:27 AM
SWEEET

Things you don't want to hear getting out of the shower.

Hamster fuzz
16 Feb 2010, 09:22 AM
SWEEET

Things you don't want to hear getting out of the shower.

AAAHHHH, AAAAHHHHH I wish i'd not had tha curry.

jawwwwsh
16 Feb 2010, 09:28 AM
*a mans voice wafts across from a changing cubicle*

"Alright Barry thats enough, my turn!"

fishman
16 Feb 2010, 12:17 PM
*peers downward* Evidently cold huh? didn't know showers could operate at absolute zero!! :oops:

or simply:

(masses of folk) SURPRISE!!!:rolleyes:

Hamster fuzz
16 Feb 2010, 05:59 PM
OMG Sarah, your a man.

X3Dragon
16 Feb 2010, 07:54 PM
Hey lets have sex!
:p

Hamster fuzz
16 Feb 2010, 11:01 PM
"Papa poker face pa pa pa poker face. Ignore me I'm just playing with my tadge" said lady gaga

Sir Meta Knight
17 Feb 2010, 02:55 AM
Hi, I'm Barry Scott!

Bang! And Lady GaGa's penis is gone...

Hamster fuzz
17 Feb 2010, 07:53 AM
Time to judge yet?

Lord Norchard
17 Feb 2010, 09:55 AM
Things you don't want to hear coming out of the shower:

A man comes at you as you exit the shower.

"My name is Ben Dover."

fishman
17 Feb 2010, 10:15 AM
Is that last bit racist? I hope not :eek:

dunno dude, but we have moved on to:

Things you don't want to hear getting out of the shower.


:p

major biscuit
17 Feb 2010, 11:10 AM
say hello to ma little fwiend

Lord Norchard
17 Feb 2010, 01:31 PM
dunno dude, but we have moved on to:

Things you don't want to hear getting out of the shower.


:p

DOH! I'll edit it.

Sal92
18 Feb 2010, 01:30 PM
Winner was Hamster Fuzz with this post


"Papa poker face pa pa pa poker face. Ignore me I'm just playing with my tadge" said lady gaga

5 points.

Second place

Major Biscuit - Say hello to my little friend (3points)

Third place

Lord Nochard - I'm barry scott, and bam gaga's penis is gone (-25 points)

And twenty points to eveyone who didn't post...

Fuzz to post (and judge) next.

Hamster fuzz
18 Feb 2010, 04:38 PM
Winner was Hamster Fuzz with this post


"Papa poker face pa pa pa poker face. Ignore me I'm just playing with my tadge" said lady gaga

5 points.

Second place

Major Biscuit - Say hello to my little friend (3points)

Third place

Lord Nochard - I'm barry scott, and bam gaga's penis is gone (-25 points)

And twenty points to eveyone who didn't post...

Fuzz to post (and judge) next.

Things you never want to hear in a fight.

Qazzer0
18 Feb 2010, 07:32 PM
So we start again now?

Hamster fuzz
18 Feb 2010, 10:21 PM
So we start again now?

Yes. The subject is:
things you wouldn't want to hear In a fight.

Saffy
18 Feb 2010, 10:37 PM
'This'll make a great addition to my spleen collection!'

Sal92
19 Feb 2010, 12:07 AM
Righhhht a fight, hmm

so this is like foreplay, yeah?

SpeedRunner
21 Feb 2010, 01:46 PM
I'm an Geordie don't you naaaarrr!

fishman
22 Feb 2010, 02:43 PM
dont forget to add points to leaderboard when you judge :)

~~~~~~~~~~~
LEADER BOARD
Sal92 - 5 points
Hamster Fuzz - 5 points
Major Biscuit - 2 points
astrox - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 point
Lord Nochard - 1 point
~~~~~~~~~~~

The subject is:
things you wouldn't want to hear In a fight.


~ hey Tyson, I think your big brother's here to help you out!

Hamster fuzz
23 Feb 2010, 07:33 PM
1.

'This'll make a great addition to my spleen collection!'

'Scuse me while i land my ROFLMAO copter!!!!

2.

Righhhht a fight, hmm

so this is like foreplay, yeah?

Oh sal92, you naught boy :loveyou:

3.

I'm an Geordie don't you naaaarrr!

Howay the lad!!!

LEADER BOARD
Sal92 - 7 points
Hamster Fuzz - 5 points
Saffy-5 points
Major Biscuit - 2 points
astrox - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 point
Lord Nochard - 1 point
Speedrunner- 1 point

Saffy to post next por favor!!

Saffy
23 Feb 2010, 07:43 PM
'Worst things to hear in a school.'

Lord Norchard
23 Feb 2010, 08:02 PM
Things you wouldn't want to hear at school

The teacher says:

Its a Sex Education lesson today and we're doing a practical!

Hamster fuzz
23 Feb 2010, 08:11 PM
Things you wouldn't want to hear at school

The teacher says:

Its a Sex Education lesson today and we're doing a practical!

How is that bad?

"Time for lessons!"

heavymetalrules
23 Feb 2010, 09:45 PM
"What do you mean this isn't maths?", says the teacher

fishman
24 Feb 2010, 03:42 AM
Good morning class, i'll be your new teacher today! And what a great day!! The school no longer has to check the sexual offenders register before hiring!!

major biscuit
25 Feb 2010, 08:23 PM
"in todays science lesson we are going to be investigating the effects of radiation on the brain...billy, please stick this uranium in your ear"

Saffy
25 Feb 2010, 09:52 PM
"in todays science lesson we are going to be investigating the effects of radiation on the brain...billy, please stick this uranium in your ear"
You win :D
That is hilarious, and oddly similar to what someone in my class said today in physics :s

2nd:
Good morning class, i'll be your new teacher today! And what a great day!! The school no longer has to check the sexual offenders register before hiring!! ~Fishman

fishman
26 Feb 2010, 12:47 AM
You win :D
That is hilarious, and oddly similar to what someone in my class said today in physics :s

2nd:
Good morning class, i'll be your new teacher today! And what a great day!! The school no longer has to check the sexual offenders register before hiring!! ~Fishman

haha cool, dont forget a 3rd place too tho!

Skepta
26 Feb 2010, 06:20 PM
Broken Noses, thick muscular necks, mishapen ears and crushing thighs.

Wow,

the rugby players wives are minging.


and its the coin toss,

and johnny wilkinson has sprained his thumb!


Sorry to be pedantic, but does he really deserve the 5 points when both of his submissions were copied directly off Mock the Week? :rolleyes:

major biscuit
26 Feb 2010, 06:45 PM
wowzer i won'ded thankiess

"worst things to hear while buying a cake"

fishman
01 Mar 2010, 12:29 PM
"worst things to hear while buying a cake"

hey joe, there seems to be a bag of flour where the rat poison should be!

Hamster fuzz
01 Mar 2010, 12:45 PM
"worst things to hear while buying a cake"

"OOOOPPPS, Mr Bond, I accidentally slipped cyanide into you eccles cake. Mwu ha ha ha"

heavymetalrules
01 Mar 2010, 05:47 PM
"well, now you mention it, I suppose the icing does look a bit like arsenic."

Mouse-Keyboard
01 Mar 2010, 05:56 PM
"When will the zoo send the chocolate we ordered?"

major biscuit
01 Mar 2010, 10:17 PM
"well, now you mention it, I suppose the icing does look a bit like arsenic."

5 points


"When will the zoo send the chocolate we ordered?"

2 points


hey joe, there seems to be a bag of flour where the rat poison should be!

1 point


"OOOOPPPS, Mr Bond, I accidentally slipped cyanide into you eccles cake. Mwu ha ha ha"

i couldnt really leave the only other entry out so well done for entering!

heavymetalrules
02 Mar 2010, 03:48 PM
'Bad things to say at a wedding'

Saffy
02 Mar 2010, 04:38 PM
'Bad things to say at a wedding'
'Do you......'
'Possibly...'

Hamster fuzz
02 Mar 2010, 07:54 PM
"I know pronounce you man and wife."

infernalrex
02 Mar 2010, 08:00 PM
I now pronounce you man and husband

Saffy
02 Mar 2010, 08:19 PM
I now pronounce you man and husband
Slight homophobia, or just thinking about mistaking a bride for a man?

infernalrex
02 Mar 2010, 08:44 PM
Slight homophobia, or just thinking about mistaking a bride for a man?


No, its what you wouldnt want to hear during a wedding!

fishman
03 Mar 2010, 12:48 AM
No, its what you wouldnt want to hear during a wedding!

do you, infernalrex, take ... er, take ....... aaaaarrrggghhhHH OMG!!! what is that?

major biscuit
03 Mar 2010, 08:47 PM
Slight homophobia, or just thinking about mistaking a bride for a man?

its called a civil ceremony not a marriage for homosexuals

and as my entry

"do you take this...?"
"yes! now wheres the booze?"

Purplejelly86
06 Mar 2010, 03:30 PM
Bestman : "Hey dave, isnt that the chick i slept with after your mates party?"

*Points at the bride*

heavymetalrules
06 Mar 2010, 10:03 PM
'Do you......'
'Possibly...'
5 points


"do you take this...?"
"yes! now wheres the booze?"
2 points


Bestman : "Hey dave, isnt that the chick i slept with after your mates party?"

*Points at the bride*
1 point

Saffy
06 Mar 2010, 10:10 PM
Me again?
Urgh

Bad things to hear after the general election winners announced.

Purplejelly86
06 Mar 2010, 10:12 PM
Drug dealer

"The package is ready"



Btw heres the ranking i think this is right.

Saffy-10 Points
Major Biscuit 9 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 5 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
astrox - 2 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
Fishman 1 Point
Amalgon 1 Point

major biscuit
07 Mar 2010, 02:27 PM
i think i have more , because i won a round earlier


caption: "great!! FIRE THE NUKESS!!!!!"

fishman
08 Mar 2010, 09:55 AM
Bad things to hear after the general election winners announced.

Winner: You see, Tony was right, the actual official count never sees the light of day! :P

Hamster fuzz
08 Mar 2010, 11:53 AM
Bad things to hear after the general election winners announced.

As winner, and leader of the BNP....

fishman
08 Mar 2010, 05:11 PM
Btw heres the ranking, this is right.

Saffy-10 Points
Major Biscuit 9 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 5 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Fishman 3 Points
astrox - 2 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
Amalgon 1 Point

lmao, ok so i checked for you (cheers for doin it btw!) and the only one yu got wrong was me! no joke, i'm on 3, not 1 :P

Hamster fuzz
08 Mar 2010, 05:24 PM
WOW! I'm amazed. I never expected to win the election!
Now to sort out the extension on number 10!

Purplejelly86
08 Mar 2010, 05:37 PM
lmao, ok so i checked for you (cheers for doin it btw!) and the only one yu got wronh was me! no joke, i'm on 3, not 1 :P

Sorry ^.^

I think it was were saffy (May be someone else) Didnt give 3rd person and i ignored it by accedent.

:P

fishman
08 Mar 2010, 05:43 PM
Sorry ^.^

I think it was were saffy (May be someone else) Didnt give 3rd person and i ignored it by accedent.

:P

aye that was the one :P

major biscuit
08 Mar 2010, 06:44 PM
As winner, and leader of the BNP....


WOW! I'm amazed. I never expected to win the election!
Now to sort out the extension on number 10!

which one are you entering?

Gouranga
08 Mar 2010, 07:14 PM
Nick griffins eye is now in control of the country

fishman
09 Mar 2010, 09:27 AM
which one are you entering?

both!!! :) i said at the beginning that multiple entries are cool :D



(will allow multiple answers if you realllly can't contain yourself... but 2 or 3 max! preferably only 1, but as i said, if you realllly cant contain yourself) :P


plus it gives a bit more life to the game, meaning it's more in the public eye if people keep posting, more people are likely to join in and play too, so i'd actually encourage it for now :D

(maybe even try and get peeps to put the topic with every caption entry? just to make it easier for other peeps to figure out what a goin on!?

fishman
09 Mar 2010, 05:31 PM
Saffy cannae judge just now, so has asked me to do it for him: here's ya go!!

1st

As winner, and leader of the BNP....

2nd


caption: "great!! FIRE THE NUKESS!!!!!"

3rd

Drug dealer

"The package is ready"

{~~LEADERBOARD~~}
Major Biscuit 11 Points
Saffy-10 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 10 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Fishman 3 Points
astrox - 2 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
Amalgon 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point

major biscuit
09 Mar 2010, 06:49 PM
due to rodent fluff being banned fishman has asked me to post a thingy, unlucky fluff

"worst thing to hear while participating in a pirate vs ninja fight"

Hamster fuzz
09 Mar 2010, 07:24 PM
due to rodent fluff being banned fishman has asked me to post a thingy, unlucky fluff

"worst thing to hear while participating in a pirate vs ninja fight"

Thanks for the kind words, but I'm back!

Worst things to hear, in a Harry Potter film.

Purplejelly86
09 Mar 2010, 08:26 PM
Harry then whipped out his magic wand and slowly pierced the evil deamon.

Sorry if that sounds too dirty.

:p

fishman
09 Mar 2010, 11:10 PM
Thanks for the kind words, but I'm back!

Worst things to hear, in a Harry Potter film.

welcome back fluffy!


excrucio herpius genitalius syphalissio jiganticus

major biscuit
10 Mar 2010, 09:35 PM
"harry was in the food hall when alqaeda struck"

Gouranga
11 Mar 2010, 03:01 PM
Snoop Dogg on being cast as dumbledore, "Im a bowt to drop some Gangster stizzle on this fizzle but the sorting hat is old school, so I bring in the pimp hizzle to sort y'all, into the news houses Westside, Eastside, Rockafeller and Def Jam"

fishman
11 Mar 2010, 05:33 PM
Snoop Dogg on being cast as dumbledore, "Im a bowt to drop some Gangster stizzle on this fizzle but the sorting hat is old school, so I bring in the pimp hizzle to sort y'all, into the news houses Westside, Eastside, Rockafeller and Def Jam"

S'posed to be "worst" things to hear!!! That would be ACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

Gouranga
11 Mar 2010, 07:17 PM
S'posed to be "worst" things to hear!!! That would be ACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D

It would be alright until the the whomping willow becomes the whomping weed plant

infernalrex
12 Mar 2010, 06:05 PM
Actor 1 " Espeliarmus!"

Actor 2 "Oh was I supposed to drop dead there? Sorry."

Actor 1 " Gah read the script you idiot!"

Actor 2 " Sorry. Hey what film is this? Is this The Sound Of Music? The hills are alive with the sounds of music! What do you think? I'v even got my make up see?

Actor 1 "......"

Director " Cut! What the hell? The SOunds OF Music scene isnt till scene 231 Act 46"

Actor 2 " Oh, no wonder I got confused."

fishman
15 Mar 2010, 01:11 AM
oooh whats that? voldemort slipped in the shower? bugger, really coulda done with the money from the next 6 films!!!

Hamster fuzz
16 Mar 2010, 08:15 PM
1.
"harry was in the food hall when alqaeda struck"

Flippin' hilarious!!!

2.


Harry then whipped out his magic wand and slowly pierced the evil deamon.

Sorry if that sounds too dirty.

:p

Dirty minded child!!!

3.

welcome back fluffy!


excrucio herpius genitalius syphalissio jiganticus

Fishy wishy.

Major biscuit to post next!!!

Major Biscuit 16 Points11+5 points
Saffy-10 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 10 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Amalgon 4 Points 2+2 points
Fishman 4 Points 3+1 points
astrox - 2 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point

major biscuit
17 Mar 2010, 05:46 PM
why thank you :)

"worst thing to hear while pretending to be a teapot"

Saffy
17 Mar 2010, 08:14 PM
I'm a little teapot short and stout, here is my handle here is my... Oh- I'm a sugar bowl!

<3

Gouranga
17 Mar 2010, 10:54 PM
Whats that Mr Bull you want a trip to the china shop?

malemew
17 Mar 2010, 11:37 PM
No thanks, I'll have a coffee instead.

Hamster fuzz
18 Mar 2010, 10:05 AM
"I'm sorry Mr Teapot, but due to new decency laws. Your nursery rhyme has been officially banned"

Purplejelly86
20 Mar 2010, 11:05 AM
"Humpty dumpty sat on a wall, Oh right oops"

major biscuit
21 Mar 2010, 12:00 AM
I'm a little teapot short and stout, here is my handle here is my... Oh- I'm a sugar bowl!

<3

winner! 5 points


No thanks, I'll have a coffee instead.

2nd! 2 points


"I'm sorry Mr Teapot, but due to new decency laws. Your nursery rhyme has been officially banned"

3rd! 1 point


Major Biscuit 16 Points
Saffy-15 Points 5 added
Hamster Fuzz - 11 Points 1 added
Sal92 - 7 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Amalgon 4 Points
Fishman 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 point 2 added
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point

[/QUOTE]

Saffy
21 Mar 2010, 09:59 AM
'Worst thing to hear in a science lab'

heavymetalrules
21 Mar 2010, 11:08 AM
" Er... Is that meant to read 25,000 Bq? "

major biscuit
21 Mar 2010, 01:10 PM
"and now we disect young timmy here"

93ross
21 Mar 2010, 01:23 PM
'Now class, today we will be studing what would happen if you drink hydrochloric acid. Any volunteers?'

Purplejelly86
21 Mar 2010, 09:52 PM
As little jimmy started to drink out of what he thought was to be a glass of water, he soon realised was what was once inside the liver of the goat he had experimented on.

infernalrex
22 Mar 2010, 06:57 PM
Oooops I dropped the nitroglycerine!

Zissou
23 Mar 2010, 02:01 AM
"And now to help study human anatomy, please welcome Dr Glitter kids"

Hamster fuzz
23 Mar 2010, 12:02 PM
"And now children, as a special experiment we are going to be dissecting Micheal Jackson. Now let's take a look inside!
OMG!!! It's alive.. arrggghhhh"

Gouranga
23 Mar 2010, 03:12 PM
"Thank you for volunteering in a study about chuck norris roundhouse kicks"

Or what happended to me Monday in chemistry

"Ready for your test ryan?"
"My what? Oh that was today? Crap"

Saffy
23 Mar 2010, 04:44 PM
'Now class, today we will be studing what would happen if you drink hydrochloric acid. Any volunteers?'



"And now to help study human anatomy, please welcome Dr Glitter kids"


"Thank you for volunteering in a study about chuck norris roundhouse kicks"

1st, 2nd and 3rd respectively :)

Well done- shall post up leader board in sec

Major Biscuit 16 Points
Saffy-15 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 11 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
93Ross - 5 Points
Zissou - 5 points
Gouranga - 5points
Amalgon 4 Points
Fishman 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point

infernalrex
23 Mar 2010, 08:23 PM
aww come on mine was awesome! On my b'day too!

Mouse-Keyboard
23 Mar 2010, 08:40 PM
aww come on mine was awesome! On my b'day too!

Yours was OK.

Hamster fuzz
23 Mar 2010, 09:14 PM
Mine was immense!
How did it not win?

Saffy
23 Mar 2010, 10:04 PM
Guys, it is my personal taste, sorry if you don't agree.

Hamster fuzz
23 Mar 2010, 10:07 PM
Guys, it is my personal taste, sorry if you don't agree.

You let me down..

93ross
23 Mar 2010, 10:23 PM
Thanks Saffy. :)

'Worst thing to hear over a tannoy in a shop.'

Saffy
23 Mar 2010, 10:28 PM
True Story:

'The shopping centre shall close in 10 minutes.'
...'Get out you old bats I want to go home!'

Silly woman- was fun though :)

Hamster fuzz
24 Mar 2010, 09:55 AM
And the winner of the "guess the name" competition, is a MR O.B Laden....

fishman
24 Mar 2010, 11:46 AM
'Worst thing to hear over a tannoy in a shop.'

Clean up in aisle 4... again!!! look peeps, this is not a library, just buy the damn dirty mags!

Gouranga
24 Mar 2010, 03:57 PM
'Worst thing to hear over a tannoy in a shop.'

Zombies in aisle 5... Zombies in aisle 5

heavymetalrules
24 Mar 2010, 10:23 PM
"Only you can hear this"

fishman
26 Mar 2010, 12:10 PM
Dave.... Daaaaave, this is god! I know you're lonely, but what you do at home alone is just pure messed up dude!

major biscuit
27 Mar 2010, 11:57 AM
"in 10 minutes we will lock the doors and release the mustard gas...and marmalade is now half price"

93ross
27 Mar 2010, 01:52 PM
1st Place:

Clean up in aisle 4... again!!! look peeps, this is not a library, just buy the damn dirty mags!

2nd Place:

And the winner of the "guess the name" competition, is a MR O.B Laden....

3rd Place:

True Story: 'The shopping centre shall close in 10 minutes.'
...'Get out you old bats I want to go home!'


Leaderboard:
--------------------
Major Biscuit 16 Points
Saffy-16 Points (+1)
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points (+2)
Fishman 9 Points (+5)
Sal92 - 7 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
93ross - 5 Points
Zissou - 5 points
Gouranga - 5points
Amalgon 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point

Congratulations - Fishman next to go :)

fishman
27 Mar 2010, 06:47 PM
Sweet! next one is:

Worlds worst thing to receive for your 18th birthday

King Gary
27 Mar 2010, 10:16 PM
A copy of the porno your mum starred in

Gouranga
28 Mar 2010, 03:28 AM
Chronic liver failure results

major biscuit
28 Mar 2010, 12:12 PM
a pebble you gave to aunt maurine on her birthday

Purplejelly86
31 Mar 2010, 10:22 AM
Your first Bill

:)

93ross
31 Mar 2010, 04:43 PM
Boris Johnson (naked) jumping out of your cake...

Nikkike
31 Mar 2010, 04:54 PM
Your first girlfriend's +ve pregnancy test

fishman
31 Mar 2010, 05:32 PM
1st - 5 points

A copy of the porno your mum starred in

2nd - 2 points

Your first girlfriend's +ve pregnancy test

3rd - 1 point

Boris Johnson (naked) jumping out of your cake...

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Major Biscuit 16 Points
Saffy-16 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Fishman 9 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
93ross - 6 Points (+1)
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Zissou - 5 points
Gouranga - 5points
King Gary - 5 points (+5)
Amalgon 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
Nikkike - 2 points (+2)
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point


King Gary to post next :D

King Gary
31 Mar 2010, 06:09 PM
World's worst thing to wake up to.


Keep it clean!!!! ;)

fishman
31 Mar 2010, 06:22 PM
World's worst thing to wake up to.


Keep it clean!!!! ;)

What appears to be swansea from above..... but approaching extremely rapidly!

King Gary
31 Mar 2010, 06:50 PM
What appears to be swansea from above..... but approaching extremely rapidly!

I wonder if it'll be friends with me? Might just be my obsession with hichiker's guide... :D

Nikkike
31 Mar 2010, 06:51 PM
World's worst thing to wake up to.

A close up view of your own entrails??

Saffy
31 Mar 2010, 07:06 PM
Your mum

Oooh, I went there.

major biscuit
31 Mar 2010, 10:53 PM
heerrreeesss johnnyy

fishman
01 Apr 2010, 10:14 AM
Ron Jeremy

Nikkike
01 Apr 2010, 10:55 AM
Ron Jeremy

ewww ..... :turtle:

19kylegreer96
01 Apr 2010, 09:52 PM
A mirror :P

King Gary
02 Apr 2010, 09:27 PM
Good entries :D

First Place

Ron Jeremy

Second place

Your mum

Oooh, I went there.


Third place

A mirror :P

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-18 Points (+2)
Major Biscuit 16 Points
Fishman 14 Points (+5)
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
93ross - 6 Points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Zissou - 5 points
Gouranga - 5points
King Gary - 5 points
Amalgon 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
Mouse-Keyboard 2 Points
Nikkike - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point (+1)

Fishman to post next

Saffy
02 Apr 2010, 09:27 PM
Its good to be king.
Bow minions.

19kylegreer96
03 Apr 2010, 01:18 AM
woop my first point, :D bring it on :rolleyes:

Purplejelly86
03 Apr 2010, 08:32 PM
Fishman hurry up and give us a topic ><

fishman
03 Apr 2010, 11:49 PM
sorry guys, have been addicted to MW2 since i got it a couple days ago!!

Worlds worst use for a fish

Nikkike
04 Apr 2010, 09:08 PM
Bed warmer :chick:

(god, i can think of loads .. but most would get "moderated" lol)

President of the United States :)

... though come to think of it, they had a potatoe last time around, didn't they? Maybe that doesn't count then ...

19kylegreer96
04 Apr 2010, 10:05 PM
A fetish

(would be a bit smelly LOL)

King Gary
04 Apr 2010, 10:56 PM
Getaway driver

Nikkike
05 Apr 2010, 12:53 PM
Undercover cop

Mouse-Keyboard
05 Apr 2010, 12:56 PM
Forum member

1. This forum requires that you wait 60 seconds between posts. Please try again in 22 seconds.

Tombo457
05 Apr 2010, 01:07 PM
As a chef, Imagine if he burnt himself :p.

Gouranga
05 Apr 2010, 09:03 PM
sorry guys, have been addicted to MW2 since i got it a couple days ago!!

Worlds worst use for a fish

A piece of headgear (the picture in caption)

fishman
06 Apr 2010, 12:38 PM
1st


President of the United States :)

lolz

2nd

Forum member

anyone we know? :rolleyes:

3rd

A piece of headgear (the picture in caption)
likin the crossover :D

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-18 Points
Major Biscuit 16 Points
Fishman 14 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Nikkike - 7 points (+5 points)
93ross - 6 Points
Gouranga - 6 points (+ 1 point)
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Zissou - 5 points
King Gary - 5 points
Amalgon 4 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points (+2 points)
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

Nikkike to post next!

Nikkike
06 Apr 2010, 01:10 PM
World's worst idea for a daytime TV programme

fishman
06 Apr 2010, 01:25 PM
World's worst idea for a daytime TV programme

the 12 part series on how to shave your hamster, working title, 'Hamster, ..... Fuzz off!!!' :p

Gouranga
06 Apr 2010, 02:34 PM
World's worst idea for a daytime TV programme

10 years younger with gordon brown

fishman
06 Apr 2010, 03:08 PM
one man and his frog!


(dont spose anyone is old enough to remember one man and his dog, or Freddie Starr on Des O'Conner show)

Gouranga
06 Apr 2010, 05:26 PM
I remember the des 'o connel show

Nikkike
06 Apr 2010, 05:36 PM
World's worst idea for a daytime TV programme

A reunion of people who remember the Des O'Connor show ^^^^^ :D

Orange Penguin
06 Apr 2010, 05:58 PM
World's worst idea for a daytime TV programme

Gary Glitter... After Dark

Sorry that just completely lowers the tone on this game... but then again talking about having a fetish for fish... :oops:

19kylegreer96
06 Apr 2010, 09:20 PM
big brother haha

Zissou
07 Apr 2010, 04:59 AM
When Katie met Noel (Edmunds)

19kylegreer96
07 Apr 2010, 05:41 PM
Mouse Keyboard and even dong a talk show about 'crack the safe'

Purplejelly86
07 Apr 2010, 08:22 PM
How to paint your wall to perfection!

Mouse-Keyboard
07 Apr 2010, 08:35 PM
How to paint your wall to perfection!

Thanks for reminding me of the really obvious one:

Watching paint dry.

Nikkike
07 Apr 2010, 11:36 PM
Okay, winners are ...

First place:


Gary Glitter... After Dark

Second place:


How to paint your wall to perfection!

Third place:


When Katie met Noel (Edmunds)

Hope I've done that right folks. Any complaints to Fishman :D


Orange Penguin to post next.


~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-18 Points
Major Biscuit 16 Points
Fishman 14 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Nikkike - 7 points
93ross - 6 Points
Gouranga - 6 points
Amalgon 6 Points (+2)
Zissou - 6 points (+1)
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
King Gary - 5 points
Orange Penguin - 5 points (+5)
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

19kylegreer96
07 Apr 2010, 11:49 PM
but then again talking about having a fetish for fish... :oops:
XD SorrY :ghost::D

Orange Penguin
08 Apr 2010, 05:24 PM
XD SorrY :ghost::D

Haha, there is nothing wrong with fish... I eat them daily but just don't have a fetish for them...

Right,
World's worst...
Online Dating Service Slogan

fishman
08 Apr 2010, 06:09 PM
Right,
World's worst...
Online Dating Service Slogan

Desperate? we do desperate, join us and there may just be someone desperate enough to settle for you :D

Purplejelly86
08 Apr 2010, 07:07 PM
Are you fed up of being unloved?
Fed up of getting turned down?
Starting to realise you've got no social life?

Then you've found the perfect place

Nikkike
08 Apr 2010, 07:35 PM
Pig Ugly? No Personality? Mortally Obese? Wrist About To Fall Off? Of course it is! That's why you're dating online! We can help you find someone as sad as yourself. Sign Up Now!

fishman
09 Apr 2010, 11:53 AM
World's worst...
Online Dating Service Slogan

You like your date to Howl? or Grunt? or maybe you're just welsh? then join Animal_Match.coom where we find you your perfect 4 legged companion :p

19kylegreer96
09 Apr 2010, 02:44 PM
gay-relationships.com, helping you find man's best friend

fishman
09 Apr 2010, 03:13 PM
gay_sheep.com when even straight animals dont satisfy your twisted perversions

Tibs
09 Apr 2010, 03:16 PM
Homersexuality.com

The dating and mating site LOL :eek:

Nikkike
09 Apr 2010, 06:56 PM
You know, I'm never going to admit to dating online again after this ..

.. sorry, I said again .. I meant never ofc .. never ...

King Gary
09 Apr 2010, 08:45 PM
Once you join us, you'll never leave...

Gouranga
09 Apr 2010, 09:37 PM
Rules of the internet:
16. There are NO girls on the internet

19kylegreer96
10 Apr 2010, 12:43 AM
Come join us, upload your pictures, and loose your on-line privacy for years to come.

Nikkike
10 Apr 2010, 11:15 AM
Find Yourself A Real Thrill Seeker with Broadmoor Dates: You'll Never (Live To) Regret It ;)

Orange Penguin
10 Apr 2010, 05:24 PM
You have no idea of just how hard you all made this! *grrr*
Okay and the winners are...

First Place

gay_sheep.com when even straight animals dont satisfy your twisted perversions

Second Place

Find Yourself A Real Thrill Seeker with Broadmoor Dates: You'll Never (Live To) Regret It ;)

Third Place

Are you fed up of being unloved?
Fed up of getting turned down?
Starting to realise you've got no social life?

Then you've found the perfect place

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Fishman - 19 Points (+5)
Saffy-18 Points
Major Biscuit 16 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 9 points (+2)
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points (+1)
93ross - 6 Points
Gouranga - 6 points
Zissou - 6 points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
King Gary - 5 points
Orange Penguin - 5 points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

Fishman... you're up!

Saffy
10 Apr 2010, 05:57 PM
:O
Knocked off my podium

major biscuit
10 Apr 2010, 07:27 PM
:O
Knocked off my podium

dont worry, at least you saw your being knocked off, i was in a different country

fishman
12 Apr 2010, 12:16 PM
hahaaaa, back in my rightful place i see :P

Worlds worst opening line of a winner's speech

Nikkike
12 Apr 2010, 12:57 PM
See, I told you!! Yeah! Yeeeaaaahhhh! Who's the Best? Who's the ******* best? Losers! Looosers!

:D

Saffy
12 Apr 2010, 01:58 PM
hahaaaa, back in my rightful place i see :P

Worlds worst opening line of a winner's speech
Hello, I'm fishman and I deserve this....

major biscuit
12 Apr 2010, 02:04 PM
Worlds worst opening line of a winner's speech

what? when did i enter this contest?

Nikkike
12 Apr 2010, 06:08 PM
Worlds worst opening line of a winner's speech

"Well howdy folks, I'm George W Bush ... "

Gouranga
12 Apr 2010, 07:57 PM
Worlds worst opening line of a winner's speech

So I herd U liek Mudkipz?

fishman
14 Apr 2010, 12:55 PM
I see no-one did the obvious to get the win ;)

hahaaaa, back in my rightful place i see :P


but yeah, 1st:

Hello, I'm fishman and I deserve this....

in joint 2nd sharing the points are:

See, I told you!! Yeah! Yeeeaaaahhhh! Who's the Best? Who's the ******* best? Losers! Looosers!

:D
and

"Well howdy folks, I'm George W Bush ... "

3rd:

what? when did i enter this contest?

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Fishman - 19 Points
Saffy-23 Points (+5)
Major Biscuit 17 Points (+1)
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 11 points (+2)
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
93ross - 6 Points
Gouranga - 6 points
Zissou - 6 points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
King Gary - 5 points
Orange Penguin - 5 points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

and no, the leaderboard order does not need changing :D

Saffy to post next!!

Saffy
14 Apr 2010, 01:44 PM
'Worst Speech to hear at a wedding'

And fishman, don't worry, I'll change it in 24 hours ;)

fishman
14 Apr 2010, 02:18 PM
'Worst Speech to hear at a wedding'

This is a proud day for me as father of the bride, a day I never though possible, primarily, as may be a bit of a shock to the groom, Laura was actually my first born son, Lewis! :eek:

Kaizang
14 Apr 2010, 04:24 PM
well as the best man i thought i best write a speech but then thought "ah sod it ill just wing it" so to summarise your two lives shes is actually your sister and he slept with your best mates mum byeeeee. *said whilst running quickly for the nearest exit*

major biscuit
14 Apr 2010, 05:02 PM
all i can reall is say is DUDE?!?! why did you marry that one? i mean of all the hookers we've met, why'd you pick her?

Orange Penguin
14 Apr 2010, 05:30 PM
Having slept with her many a time, all I can say to Mr Alex Reid is that you can do so much better.

King Gary
14 Apr 2010, 10:17 PM
Your parent's would have loved to have been here tonight, but we did the next best thing, here's their handlers from London Zoo!

fishman
15 Apr 2010, 03:28 PM
As Best Man, I will say good luck and you'll definitely enjoy tonight!! She does this remarkable thing with her tongue!! plus she's certainly the best lay i've ever had, i'm sure Bob will testify the same!! and Ryan, and Scott, and Barry, and Will, and Stuart, and Greg, and Chris, and Andy, and Dave, and Rob, and Richard, and Tim and Robbie and Craig and Martin and Matty and Phil and Simon and Fred and Mike..... Isn't that right boys??

*Rowdy* YEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHRRRHHHH :D *wolf whistles*

Saffy
15 Apr 2010, 04:59 PM
1st (+5)

all i can reall is say is DUDE?!?! why did you marry that one? i mean of all the hookers we've met, why'd you pick her?
Hilarity.
2nd (+2)

Your parent's would have loved to have been here tonight, but we did the next best thing, here's their handlers from London Zoo!
Expected, but still good.
3rd (+1)

Having slept with her many a time, all I can say to Mr Alex Reid is that you can do so much better.
Expected, but funny still.
Special Mention (+0)

As Best Man, I will say good luck and you'll definitely enjoy tonight!! She does this remarkable thing with her tongue!! plus she's certainly the best lay i've ever had, i'm sure Bob will testify the same!! and Ryan, and Scott, and Barry, and Will, and Stuart, and Greg, and Chris, and Andy, and Dave, and Rob, and Richard, and Tim and Robbie and Craig and Martin and Matty and Phil and Simon and Fred and Mike..... Isn't that right boys??

*Rowdy* YEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHRRRHHHH :D *wolf whistles*
Too long, and you already posted ;)
The length makes me wonder if you already said that somewhere else... ;)

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-23 Points <-- Where I belong
Major Biscuit 22 Points +5
Fishman - 19 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 11 points
King Gary - 7 points +2
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
Orange Penguin - 6 points +1
93ross - 6 Points
Gouranga - 6 points
Zissou - 6 points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

Major Biscuit to post next.

fishman
15 Apr 2010, 05:09 PM
The length makes me wonder if you already said that somewhere else... ;)

or someone said it about me :rolleyes:



and you already posted ;)
Mahaaa, check zee rules! I made em up after all :p :D

major biscuit
16 Apr 2010, 12:58 PM
why thank you, im coming up from behind saffy ;)

worlds worst thing to hear while in a curtain store

Gouranga
16 Apr 2010, 02:00 PM
worlds worst thing to hear while in a curtain store

Pull yourself together!

fishman
16 Apr 2010, 03:31 PM
Pull yourself together!

*shakes head in severe shaked headedness* aaah Gouranga :( I'm ashamed


worlds worst thing to hear while in a curtain store

you want blinds? sweet, i've been wanting to try out my new sulphuric acic super-soaker

Orange Penguin
16 Apr 2010, 05:43 PM
worlds worst thing to hear while in a curtain store

We have a lovely pale pink curtain that I think would look just great, but for a balaclava? I think black is the way to go there.

I'm sorry, that was all i could think of :(

DotF
16 Apr 2010, 06:16 PM
worlds worst thing to hear while in a curtain store

Those curtains Lady Gaga designed for your house are in.

Gouranga
16 Apr 2010, 08:36 PM
*shakes head in severe shaked headedness* aaah Gouranga :( I'm ashamed

Someone had too

Tibs
16 Apr 2010, 08:58 PM
I GET MY CURTAINS FROM THE BEST ONLINE MARKETS! I'M NOT SELLING ANY OLD CURTAINS JUST OUT OF THE BLUE! YOU NEVER KNOW WHERE THEY'VE BEEN! AND ITS THE SAME WITH MY FISH, TOO!

http://www.asterix.co.nz/mistakes/greatcrossing/unhygenix.jpg

horse
16 Apr 2010, 09:39 PM
Sorry, we no longer stock blackout blinds,
it's racist...



[...] also no mentioning Laika at all.
Regards
OK :)

Tibs
18 Apr 2010, 11:02 AM
Be carefull, this golden, exotic curtain cost me more than all your fines put together, sonny! ...

major biscuit
18 Apr 2010, 01:48 PM
Pull yourself together!
the obvious and it gets points for being so +5 points


Sorry, we no longer stock blackout blinds,
it's racist...


i would lol +2 points


Those curtains Lady Gaga designed for your house are in.

:D +1 point

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-23 Points
Major Biscuit 22 Points
Fishman - 19 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 11 points
King Gary - 7 points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
Orange Penguin - 6 points
93ross - 6 Points
Gouranga - 11 points +5
Zissou - 6 points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
horse - 2 points +2
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
dotf - 1 point
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

gouranga, your up!

Gouranga
18 Apr 2010, 04:13 PM
I actually didn't expect to win


~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-23 Points
Major Biscuit 22 Points
Fishman - 19 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 11 points
Gouranga - 11 points
King Gary - 7 points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
Orange Penguin - 6 points
93ross - 6 Points
Zissou - 6 points
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
horse - 2 points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
dotf - 1 point
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

Worst thing to hear at a bar

fishman
19 Apr 2010, 11:04 AM
Worst thing to hear at a bar
inspired from your sig, but modified as to who says it :P
->

I like you

Nikkike
19 Apr 2010, 08:36 PM
Fishy, is this the next one?

Worst thing to hear at a bar????

If so, it's:


Tick, tick, tick ..... BOOM!!!!!!!!

major biscuit
19 Apr 2010, 09:18 PM
we dont serve alcohol here

fishman
20 Apr 2010, 01:56 PM
Fishy, is this the next one?

Worst thing to hear at a bar????


yup :D

World's Worst thing to hear at a bar:

Aha great!! Gay pensioner strip night!!! and isn't this the aniversary doo where the whole audience gets to join in too?

DotF
20 Apr 2010, 02:37 PM
Worst thing to hear at a bar
(when you have been training your whole life for the high jump)

.. and today at the Olympics we thought we'd try something a bit different ... limbo!!!!*


*I decide to go on a bit of a tangent :oops::confused:


Worst thing to hear at a bar????

If so, it's:


Tick, tick, tick ..... BOOM!!!!!!!!

Oh no :( Have early 90's Hip-Hopsters Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8snaaMTiVM) turned up :)

King Gary
21 Apr 2010, 04:05 PM
Here come the Ugly Cyote girls, you won't be able to buy alchohol for the next half hour while they do their silly little dance. Damn it girls, it's a bar, not peppermint rhino!!!!!! :mad:

Fizzy
21 Apr 2010, 04:42 PM
Worst thing to hear at a bar:


"And a big big thank you to the guys behind the bar tonight, they will be handing you all your drinks and change, thanks for helping out whilst our normal barstaff are off ill, and a big thank you to the Leprosy Society for sending them at such short notice"

Nikkike
21 Apr 2010, 04:50 PM
Oh no :( Have early 90's Hip-Hopsters Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8snaaMTiVM) turned up :)

LOL. That would be even worse than a bomb, methinks ;)

(oh goody, and you even posted a link .. how accommodating of you :D )

DotF
21 Apr 2010, 05:27 PM
Worst thing to hear at a bar: "And a big big thank you to the guys behind the bar tonight, they will be handing you all your drinks and change, thanks for helping out whilst our normal barstaff are off ill, and a big thank you to the Leprosy Society for sending them at such short notice"

At least with them serving you you don't have to worry about being left a tip :eek:


(oh goody, and you even posted a link .. how accommodating of you :D )
We aims to please :)

Gouranga
22 Apr 2010, 01:56 AM
Winner, I liked the different take

(when you have been training your whole life for the high jump)

.. and today at the Olympics we thought we'd try something a bit different ... limbo!!!!*


*I decide to go on a bit of a tangent :oops::confused:


2nd and too true :(

Here come the Ugly Cyote girls, you won't be able to buy alchohol for the next half hour while they do their silly little dance. Damn it girls, it's a bar, not peppermint rhino!!!!!! :mad:

3rd

Worst thing to hear at a bar:


"And a big big thank you to the guys behind the bar tonight, they will be handing you all your drinks and change, thanks for helping out whilst our normal barstaff are off ill, and a big thank you to the Leprosy Society for sending them at such short notice"

DotF
22 Apr 2010, 08:52 AM
I liked the different take

Yay!! :)

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-23 Points
Major Biscuit 22 Points
Fishman - 19 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 11 points
Gouranga - 11 points
King Gary - 9 points (+2)
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
Orange Penguin - 6 points
93ross - 6 Points
Zissou - 6 points
dotf - 6 points (+5)
Heavymetal rules 5 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
horse - 2 points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point
Fizzy - 1 point (+1)

Worst thing to hear your teacher / boss say

fishman
22 Apr 2010, 05:05 PM
Worst thing to hear your teacher / boss say

Good news, we've secured that Nigeria Contract during the world cup, unfortunately you'll be offshore for a month with no access to tv or internet!

(actually almost happened)

Orange Penguin
22 Apr 2010, 05:12 PM
Worst thing to hear your teacher / boss say

And today, class, we'll be studing the Life Works of Gordon Brown.

Fizzy
22 Apr 2010, 05:15 PM
Worst thing to hear your teacher / boss say

Hey, you know that room you want to rent out, well I've just split from my wife, so Ive taken it

Nikkike
22 Apr 2010, 06:39 PM
You've been posted. You leave for Iceland this weekend :)

major biscuit
22 Apr 2010, 08:00 PM
and today class we are looking at shakespeares plays

Nikkike
22 Apr 2010, 09:04 PM
and today class we are looking at shakespeares plays

Oy! That's not a bad thing! :D

DotF
23 Apr 2010, 12:51 PM
Worst thing to hear your teacher / boss say:

1st + 5

Hey, you know that room you want to rent out, well I've just split from my wife, so Ive taken it
... true story? :)

2nd + 2

You've been posted. You leave for Iceland this weekend :)
... by Herring express as all the planes are grounded :eek:

3rd +1

And today, class, we'll be studying the Life Works of Gordon Brown.
... surely no one would be so cruel?

@ Fishman. Good try but wrong audience. Not having to watch football sounds like bliss to me :oops::)

Mouse-Keyboard
23 Apr 2010, 04:41 PM
~~~Leaderboard~~~
Saffy-23 Points
Major Biscuit 22 Points
Fishman - 19 Points
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Nikkike - 13 points (+2)
Gouranga - 11 points
King Gary - 9 points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
Orange Penguin - 7 points (+1)
93ross - 6 Points
Zissou - 6 points
dotf - 6 points
Fizzy - 6 points (+5)
Heavymetal rules - 5 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
horse - 2 points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

Fizzy
25 Apr 2010, 08:14 PM
Things you should never say in a job interview


go go go

Liam.D
25 Apr 2010, 09:11 PM
:O Are those REAL!!!???

Saffy
25 Apr 2010, 09:14 PM
I can't wait to work here... Where's the stationary cupboard?

major biscuit
25 Apr 2010, 09:42 PM
sooooo, make me a sandwich?

Gouranga
25 Apr 2010, 09:48 PM
I done some great work at this Danish newspaper, my cartoons really got me a reaction

DotF
25 Apr 2010, 09:53 PM
Things you should never say in a job interview

Hi I'm Peter File ...



@ Mouse-Keyboard. I like the Gold, Silver, Bronze rankings :)

Nikkike
25 Apr 2010, 10:34 PM
things you should never say in a job interview

You! Open the safe! The rest of you get down on the floor and give me your valuables!!!!

fishman
26 Apr 2010, 10:42 AM
Things you should never say in a job interview


Seriously? A female boss? haha, pull the other one!

King Gary
26 Apr 2010, 03:17 PM
I'll be ok once the medication wears off. Oh, btw, i can only work three hours a week

Orange Penguin
26 Apr 2010, 04:56 PM
Things you should never say in a job interview

I would just like to say... I hope the fact that I've cheated on all three of you doesn't influence my chances of working here.

Fizzy
30 Apr 2010, 08:41 AM
Things you should never say in a job interview


1st +5 point



Seriously? A female boss? haha, pull the other one!


2nd +2 point




sooooo, make me a sandwich?

3rd + 1 point



You! Open the safe! The rest of you get down on the floor and give me your valuables!!!!



Next!!!!

Mikle
30 Apr 2010, 11:09 AM
(when you have been training your whole life for the high jump)

.. and today at the Olympics we thought we'd try something a bit different ... limbo!!!!*


*I decide to go on a bit of a tangent :oops::confused:



Oh no :( Have early 90's Hip-Hopsters Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D8snaaMTiVM) turned up :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TqkJ30Kh7ZM

An alternative...

fishman
30 Apr 2010, 12:17 PM
Sweet!! Unlucky saffy, down 2!!! :rolleyes:

~~~Leaderboard~~~
Fishman - 24 Points +5
Major Biscuit 24 Points +2
Saffy-23 Points
Nikkike - 14 points +1
Hamster Fuzz - 13 Points
Gouranga - 11 points
King Gary - 9 points
Sal92 - 7 Points
Amalgon 7 Points
Orange Penguin - 7 points
93ross - 6 Points
Zissou - 6 points
dotf - 6 points
Fizzy - 6 points
Heavymetal rules - 5 Points
Mouse-Keyboard 4 Points
horse - 2 points
astrox - 2 Points
malemew - 2 points
St0rM 59 - 1 Point
Lord Nochard - 1 Point
Speedrunner- 1 Point
19kylegreer96 - 1 Point

Next is:

Worlds Worst sick day excuse

Tombo457
30 Apr 2010, 12:33 PM
Next is:

Worlds Worst sick day excuse

Sorry boss i can't come to work today im still stuck in Iceland :p.

Nikkike
30 Apr 2010, 05:27 PM
Worlds Worst sick day excuse

Can't come in today .. or for the next 25 yrs actually.. my court case just finished :(

Mouse-Keyboard
30 Apr 2010, 05:32 PM
The receptionist has a restraining order against me.


@ Mouse-Keyboard. I like the Gold, Silver, Bronze rankings :)

Thanks

Saffy
30 Apr 2010, 07:13 PM
I had a fatal injury, but I've recovered :)

Mouse-Keyboard
30 Apr 2010, 07:16 PM
I had a fatal injury, but I've recovered :)

Shamelessly stolen from something by Russel Howard (I haven't seen it, just the ads)

Saffy
30 Apr 2010, 07:17 PM
Shamelessly stolen from something by Russel Howard (I haven't seen it, just the ads)
Actually, tweaked from a Newspaper, but it also fit into a German lesson today where one of my friends used 'I lost my head, but I found it again'

Mouse-Keyboard
30 Apr 2010, 07:33 PM
Actually, tweaked from a Newspaper, but it also fit into a German lesson today where one of my friends used 'I lost my head, but I found it again'

What was it in the newspaper?

Saffy
30 Apr 2010, 08:15 PM
What was it in the newspaper?
'Man recovers from Fatal accident.'